The things kids say

[Bunnylump]

Difficult, isn't it? And the dim teacher was expecting that lot to do it!!!

[Laura]

My primary school named the seven classes after the colours of the rainbow, so at least by the age of 11, all the kids in the school knew that little piece of information!

[clvrlad]

to continue the the year numbering diversion
mine for high school were
1st
2nd
3rd
4th and
11th

dont tell any one but i think my school kidnapped me for 6 years and kept me drugged

[Bunnylump]

Today I was just saying to a kid:
"Now, if I told you that if you can't remember how to do that tomorrow, I'll have to rip your arms and legs off and beat you about the head with them, what would you say?" (hoping he might say he'd take it home and revise for his test).

He replied:
"I'd say "Would you still be saying that if you'd actually realised the head teacher is standing directly behind you?""
And he was. Good point, well made, I felt. That kid will go far.

[Bunnylump]

Well I was a nice middle class kid. So what can I tell you? (Although I did manage to avoid pregnancy thank goodness. Sadly I didn't manage to avoid RE).

And how therefore do you explain your daughter and son? Gooseberry bush?

They were the result of "immaculate conception". Well that's what my husband called it, anyway. I wasn't convinced, myself...

[Laura]

Today I was just saying to a kid:
"Now, if I told you that if you can't remember how to do that tomorrow, I'll have to rip your arms and legs off and beat you about the head with them, what would you say?" (hoping he might say he'd take it home and revise for his test).

He replied:
"I'd say "Would you still be saying that if you'd actually realised the head teacher is standing directly behind you?""
And he was. Good point, well made, I felt. That kid will go far.

We have a teacher at our school who asks the kids 'Now, would you prefer it if I throw you out of the window feet first or head first?'. Some of the just look gormlessly at her, but others spend a little time and make a decision!

[Cenwulf]

Re the periodic table:
I put this on DVP (http://217.174.252.57/JForum-2.1.6/post ... /1333.page);

While I was doing A level chemistry, I was taught a little rhythmic phrase to remember the order of the first 20 symbols, and I just elaborated from there. I started by extending it to 30, then 40, then 61, then 80, then 103.
When I recently found out the names of the new elements 104-09, I added them as well. I have now added 110 and 111 to the mnemonic.
[...]
If you use ' for an unstressed vowel, it was originally
H' heli beb c'n of nena m'gal sips clark ca
I added to it:
H' heli beb c'n of nena m'gal sips clark casc tiv c'rm'n fe coni cuz'n gage asse br' k'r r'b s'ry z'r (has he broke a rib? sorry, sir) (40)
N'b mot'c rurh p'dag c'd ins'n s'b teixe c's balace p'rn'd p'm s'm eu g'd t'b d'y hoer t'my blu (71)
H'f ta w're osir p'tau* h'g t'l p'bbi po at r'n f'r ra acth pa u n'ppu am c'm b'kc'f es f'm (Am come back of ee's farm) (100)
M'd nol'r r'f d'b s'g b'h-h's m't d'sr'g.
*au as in 'caught'

Here's a more suitable mnemonic (covering the first four rows):
Horrid HEnry LIkes BEing Bad
Can Not Open Fred's NEw NAughty MaGazine
ALl SIlly People Should CLean ARthur's Kitchen
CAn SChoolkids TIdy Vanessa's CRazy MaNsion?
FEel COld NIghtshirt, CUriously ZiNgy!
GAunt GErman AScends, SEeing BRoken KRyptonite

[kingsley]

Me and my friends once learnt the first 50 (we had nothing better to do in chemistry lessons! ) I can still remember about 30 or so!

[Bunnylump]

That's impressive!
And CW - thank you - I'll try that out on them tomorrow.
One of the few girls in there did come up with one bit for the M(g) Al Si P S section, which was
Men
All
Silly
Plonkers

[Scurra]

Of course, if you haven't seen it, you also need to watch this...

http://www.privatehand.com/flash/elements.html

[LAT]

I had wondered whether to suggest they all just learnt the words of his song. It's on the CD I got for Christmas.

[Laura]

Ordinarily, I would say that learning things as a song makes them easier to remember, because the tune helps bring the words back to your mind. But from what I remember of that particular song (and I can't listen to it at the moment to check), there isn't a huge amount of tune, so it might not be that helpful!!!!

[Bunnylump]

Well I enjoyed it. But I think you're right, Laura, not especially helpful. Especially for single science group. Some of them have difficulty remembering the word SCIENCE.

[Bunnylump]

Oh to exemplify what I mean about the single science group (this isn't funny, but does tell you why we have so many problems):
They had been asked to react 8 different chemicals - in specified pairs, and record the temperature change to see if the reaction was endothermic or exothermic (easy peasy). We had the 4 different combinations on different tables so they couldn't get confused. This is what happened.

BOY: This is F'ing stupid miss. Nothing's happening.
ME: What have you got in your test tube?
BOY: Some of that (pointing at a flask of hydrochloric acid)
ME: And what else have you got in there?
BOY: Some more of that, Miss (again indicating the hydrochloric acid).
ME: So you've put two lots of the same thing, from a flask, into a test tube, and you're hoping for a reaction - why?
BOY: Because things react in test tubes.
ME: Why do you suppose we put the other bottle on the table there, and you have two chemicals on your chart?
BOY: How would I know?
ME: Because we spent the first 20 minutes of the lesson explaining that?

<sigh>

I was, at this point quite tempted to suggest that he tried reacting the hydrochloric acid with the seat of his trousers, but I thought better of it...

[MBH]

I think you should get a whacking big test tube and put HIM in - see what sort of reaction that creates.

[clvrlad]

well i would make a suggestion about bits of him being in glass....
but i think a test tube might be too big for it since he's obviously not using it

[Bunnylump]

I actually think he is using it instead of a brain...

and if you knew what this poor child's surname was you'd realise just how appropriate it is.

[MBH]

I don't suppose he has a pretty American cousin does he?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj3iNxZ8Dww

[kathlyn]

do you think she watched the replay and understood a word she said?

[MBH]

I personally believe that some blond teenagers are unable to do so because, some people out there have swapped their brain for beauty products...