"What features would you like, Madam? This one has 26 gazillion mega pixies, this one is wifie enabled, this one has a full scale orchestra inside it..."
"No I just want one with BIG letters that's REALLY REALLY loud."
"But surely you are interested in it's Bluebeard capabilities?"
"Big font please."
"Internet compatibility? Satellite irrigation?"
"Loud"
"Any other special features?"
"Well it would be quite handy if I could make phone calls on it."