Today I've mostly bin...

[kathlyn]

We had some lovely red wine and some moreish french cheese but I refused to eat snails!

[LAT]

Oh how lovely Kathlyn - and I've never fancied snails either. Too much like a garden pest.

[Cenwulf]

You keep trying to trace a path to include 5 counties and keep failing until you finally spot a little village call 'Kent' --- or something like that

Depends on the location. If you go from Coventry to Burton on Trent on the A444, you include West Midlands, Warwickshire, Leicestershire, Derbyshire and Staffordshire in about 35 miles.

In fact, it used to be possible to travel through four counties in a minute - by circling a pub at No Man's Heath called 'The Four Counties'; before the boundaries were rejigged in the 1970's, it was situated where Staffordshire, Warwickshire, Derbyshire and Leicestershire met. There is a mark on the fireplace which indicates the exact location of this point.

[MBH]

Stupid McAfee came up with a thing saying "a website is trying to access your computer, do you want to block it?"

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

When did programmers STOP giving meaningful messages ESPECIALLY when they want a reply from the operator??????? Since the website was trying to access the computer the McAfee must have know which website it was - so build that into the message.

[SparkOut]

Oh goodness, yes! In all sorts of applications, things should be more meaningful. Things would be so much easier if applications were not told to say "Invalid input" and gave a helpful message like "A number between 0 and 100 is required" (as appropriate) instead.

[Bunnylump]

Crikey, two computer people with common sense? What's that all about? Can't you two go and sort the computer companies out? My life would be so much more simple. And while you're on, tell them that Microsoft HELP is NOT helpful unless you understand computers. And in which case you'd probably not be consulting HELP in the first place. What they need is to get clueless idiots like me to "test" the help answers to see if they make sense!!

My particular favourite is "YOU HAVE PERFORMED AN ILLEGAL OPERATION. Or even better YOU HAVE PERFORMED A FATAL OPERATION. But then doesn't go on to tell you WHAT you did and, more crucially, how to UNDO it.

[MBH]

Can't you two go and sort the computer companies out?

No - it appears I'm "old and useless" Go figure........

There was a pilot flying a small single engine charter plane, with a couple of very important executives on board. He was coming into Seattle airport through thick fog with less than 10m visibility when his instruments went out. So he began circling around looking for landmark. After an hour or so, he starts running pretty low on fuel and the passengers are getting very nervous. Finally, a small opening in the fog appears and he sees a tall building with one guy working alone on the fifth floor. The pilot banks the plane around, rolls down the window and shouts to the guy "Hey, where am I? To this, the solitary office worker replies "You're in a plane." The pilot rolls up the window, executes a 275 degree turn and proceeds to execute a perfect blind landing on the runway of the airport 5 miles away. Just as the plane stops, so does the engine as the fuel has run out.

The passengers are amazed and one asks how he did it. "Simple" replies the pilot, "I asked the guy in that building a simple question. The answer he gave me was 100 percent correct but absolutely useless, therefore that must be Microsoft's support office and from there the airport is just a while away."

[LAT]

Very good.

I hate Microsoft so-called 'Help' so much I find it quicker to do an internet search for the symptoms.

[Redfraggle]

5 counties - We left Antrim and went into Down - then onward to Armagh, through Tyrone and on into Londonderry. We missed Fermanagh. But we did go into monaghan which is over the border into Ireland!

Spent the evening gardening - it's lovely here today!

MBH you are such a big flirt!

[katsmom]

...stuck in a room watching students take exams for the past 2 days. There is nothing worse than the smell of 300 students in a room!

[Bunnylump]

Oh, I know EXACTLY what you mean. Mind you, I've been an amanuensis for a 6th former who's been sitting his A level modules. He comes in wearing, wait for it...
a suit
a jumper
a fleece
a skiing jacket
and refuses to take any of them off. I'm sat there in a blouse. By the end of an hour and a half exam HE STINKS. Yuk. And I have to sit directly next to him. This is when I wish I had my twin's lack of sense of smell...

[MBH]

I've been an amanuensis

Is that anything like an onlineadoptedsis? Hey - I've learned another new word

Poor lad must feel the cold

[katsmom]

I'm stuck in this room with them for another hour. I'm seriously considering adding deodorant to the a/c!

Poor Bunny. At least I don't need to sit next to them.

[Bunnylump]

And you're allowed to use the internet?

If anyone is found accessing the internet or in possession of a mobile phone here, the exams are nullified! And that includes the invigilators. We almost had an international incident when one of the stupid invigilators ANSWERED HER PHONE during a maths GCSE. And it was only her husband asking what there was for dinner!! Stupid woman. Good job the exams inspector wasn't there at the time.

[katsmom]

We're taking it on shifts. There are 4 of us in the room. One in front on the computer for 1/2 hour each time, one on each side of the hall, and one pulling guard duty and loo runs. Nothing worse than loo runs. I hate that 1/2 hour.

[Bunnylump]

I can totally sympathise. Feeling for you here!!

[giraffe]

They are allowed to go to the loo in an exam?

[Bunnylump]

Yes, but they have to go with an invigilator!!

[giraffe]

We were never allowed to go in an exam, and I'm sure the exams wer longer in those days. All my O levels were 2 and a half hours, but none of Kingsley's are that long. A levels were 3 hours I think, I remember leaving before my sister when she was doing A levels in the same room that I did O levels.

[LAT]

They seem to split the papers up into several shorter exams now. And we would never have been able to go to the loo either. Apart from anything else, you lose valuable exam time surely?